Thank you so much for all the kind words and wise thoughts, many from those who are living quietly sober for many years. I appreciate all your sentiments.
I got through the Saturday night and the Sunday night intact. I didn't plan to drink, I was more upset that such a strong feeling could conjure itself up from almost nothing and still influence me after all I've learned and said and do, in fact, believe.
How could I still think a glass of wine might be a 'nice' thing to have?
I also felt a bit of a fraud after so many people have said how helpful, inspirational even, they have found this blog to be for their own recovery. I hope none feel let down. I'm not infallible. I'm merely human too, and it wouldn't be true to hide the hard times and only display the good ones. Here, you get the whole package.
I thought I'd harness your support some more: I've been contacted by a reader, female, 40ish, in the early stages of sobriety who is looking for a penpal more advanced in sobriety who can exchange emails or texts on a frequent, almost daily basis if possible, to give her some additional personalised support. If you think you could pay it forward in this way and would like to help someone navigate the early days and benefit from your experience, drop me an email and I'll put you in touch.
Til next time comrades. Over and out. X