Saturday 28 March 2015

The Significance and Excitement of 28th March 2015


Today I am 2 years sober.
or
104 weeks
or
730 days
or
many many hours, depending on how you are currently counting your sober time.

Either way, that represents a lot of wine I have not consumed: at my last pace it would be at least 500 bottles of wine and that's only allowing for 5 per week, with no extra at the weekend or other occasions deemed 'special' in some way or other.

500 bottles of wine! Picture that for a moment, it seems much more significant than 2 years!

I haven't mentioned the date at home. OH would not realise, ask, wonder, nor find it in any way relevant, so I quietly congratulate myself while looking at the two new beads I bought for my charm bracelet. They're fairly plain, white and a little shiny and have no resemblance to a drink, glass, or bottle of wine, but I love them, and I know exactly what they represent.

I'm surprised at how 2 years with no alcohol seems to be both a massive deal and a non event at the same time. It's a big part of my life because... it doesn't feature in my life, and as time passes it features even less in my thoughts and falls outwith my radar.
The 'challenges' are no longer challenging, they are just the way things are now. I firmly believe there is no option. Indeed, I don't actually want any option. I would not have a glass of wine even if you told me I could and could stop at that one. I don't see the point any more.
Alcohol was almost like a massive storm, a tornado even, whipping up chaos and destruction in its pathway with me tightly sucked into its vortex. For many years I stayed there, unable to see the solution was to remove it from the equation and allow the storm to pass.

I can see it clearly now, and believe me when I say, there is no-one more surprised by this than me.



15 comments :

  1. Dearest Rachel,
    Is it even possible to believe that booze is not a part of our lives anymore?? This is just the best thing that could ever happen & you put it so eloquently friend!
    I know what you mean when you say its a non- issue. It doesn't even factor into our lives anymore, yet it was such a demon for years. I know that the only people who really get this are people just like us that struggled with it for so many many days, weeks, years.
    Just so very proud of you & you're ability to put it into words everyone of us can relate to. Your blog is a lifesaver to many. Love, Patti

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    1. That's so kind of you to say so Patti. Previously I would never have understood someone saying that it was a non event. I would have pitied them for missing out on this crucial life ingredient! x

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  3. Wow! 2 years is so cool!
    I love each day I don't drink.
    Even bad days are better!
    Hugs!
    Wendy

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    1. yep, they say the worst day sober is better than any day drunk- have I got that right?

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  4. congrats! and what a nice outlook :-)

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  5. I'm so glad you bought yourself those beads for your bracelet as this is a HUGE achievement and should be remembered and self-gifted accordingly!! :)

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    1. thank you. I knew I could count on you for a fan fare!

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  6. Rachel, your book Sober is the New Black changed my life. Your continued story inspires me daily. Congratulations on 2 years! WOW! I will always be grateful to you. Rock on, Rachel <3

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    1. I am flattered if surprised to inspire you. That has been an unforeseen benefit from my, at times, very self centred blog.
      Thanks for commenting.
      Rx

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  7. This inspires so much hope, thank you! I am a baby blogger and green in sobriety, halfway through my 8th day. I have been thinking a lot about how this last week I have been defined by being in recovery. I am not thinking about drinking, but I am constantly thinking about the extent of my sickness and NOT drinking. I am looking forward to when drinking, or not, is just a fleeting thought, like you said, not a thing. Congrats on two years and thank you.

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    1. Hi Jill and welcome. can you post a link to your blog? Each stage will come to you! Congrats on eight days, including a whole weekend so far!
      Rx

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Go on, spill.

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